


Baby, Won't You Stop?

by desiderate



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Kim Minseok | Xiumin-centric, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Rape Recovery, Rape/Non-con Elements, Sad with a Happy Ending, i'm sorry minseok
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-09-17
Updated: 2018-12-18
Packaged: 2018-12-30 18:07:05
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,638
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12114282
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/desiderate/pseuds/desiderate
Summary: Minseok went to a friend's one night, and came back late.Came back late covered in bruises, hurt.Despondent and struggling, Sehun is the only one awake to help Minseok.But even after that first night, how long will it take Minseok to regain his sense of self?At the same time, Sehun, young and used to being taken care of, learns to take care of his hyung.And learns that he wants to continue to take care of his hyung, in more than just a friendly way.But Minseok has a long way to go before Sehun can even consider making a move.And Sehun will help him get there, as much as he can.





	1. The Eve

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There is no significance to the title yet, I was just desperate to have one.  
> I honestly don't know where this is heading, I just had a feeling and needed to write this.  
> Besides, the world needs more Sexiu.  
> I know I should be working on my other pieces -- but even if I take a long time to update them, I will always finish them. Please be patient.  
> This is dark, please be advised when reading.

Sehun laid lounging on the couch, long legs spread across the cushions as his thumb lazily scrolled upward on his phone screen. The light of the TV dimly flickered, illuminating his face every few seconds, but Sehun paid no attention to the program that was playing; he barely even noticed the photos appearing on his Instagram feed. His mind was wandering toward sleep, eyes fighting against the pull of drowsiness.

Yet he could not find the will to remove himself from their living room and retreat to the bedroom he shared with Junmyeon. He should in fact be resting -- they’d had the night off tonight, the hours after dinner unusually free. Tomorrow they had to return to their early morning practices, and it really would be best to turn in early and sleep while he had the chance.

But the missing presence of a certain member kept Sehun restlessly checking his phone for hours, midnight coming and passing, and still no sign of Minseok. The eldest hyung had left after helping to clean up dinner, claiming he was meeting up with a friend for drinks.

Baekhyun and Jongdae had teased him about finally finding someone to drink with, and not just staying home alone and drinking in his room. Junmyeon was surprised Minseok wasn’t taking advantage of the free time to visit Tan, but Minseok had assured the leader that he had just seen his cat a couple days previously.

Still, it was a little worrying that Minseok was still out. Even though his hyung liked drinking, he never stayed out too late; he was always responsible and never came stumbling home, especially when he knew he had to do intense dancing in the morning. He held his drink well and tended to pace himself so that he stayed on the euphoric side of tipsiness. 

It was nearing one in the morning, and Sehun might’ve let it go had the rain not started an hour ago. The storm could be heard against the windows in the dorm, starting out as a soft drizzle yet growing exponentially into a ferocious downpour. Through their blinds, Sehun had even spotted flashes of lightning, and loud thundering sounds had begun not minutes ago.

It was dangerous for his hyung to be out at this hour, and Sehun knew his hyung knew better. Normally, he would stay at his friend’s house if he was out too late or out in poor weather; he always remembered to send a text to the dorm’s group chat, just to tell any awake members not to expect him back for the night.

Sehun had texted Minseok multiple times since midnight, but had not received a reply. Even as he feigned nonchalance, his mind wandered away from his phone screen and toward thoughts of his eldest hyung. He should just trust Minseok, and go to bed; maybe his hyung had fallen asleep and forgotten to text, or maybe his phone had died. 

Sehun tried to ignore the nauseous rumbling of his stomach, and instead let his eyes drift toward the clock. 1:20. He would give Minseok another forty minutes, and then he would truly start to worry. He would wake up Junmyeon and ignore the leader’s whines about Minseok being a grown adult, because it was better to be safe than sorry.

Sehun felt reassured of his plan, possibly too secure in it, that he couldn’t help but let his eyes slip close for just a moment. Or what seemed like just a moment, but truly Sehun descended into a state between sleep and consciousness, registering faintly the sounds of the rain and thunder, but unable to open his eyes. 

The time seemed to pass effortlessly in this middle state, and at the sound of the creaking front door, Sehun found his eyes opening to the digital clock across from him blinking a time of 3:02. 

Bolting up, the maknae rubbed his eyes and cursed his inability to remain awake. Eyes searching for what woke him up, Sehun’s gaze landed on the front door and the shadowy figure that stood motionless in front of it, seemingly leaning his body weight against the closed door. 

Blinking his eyes a few times and letting them adjust to the light he had left on, Sehun was quickly able to identify the figure as his missing hyung. It was Minseok.

At the same time, it seemed not like Minseok at all.

His long dark hair lay wet on his head, strands of it sticking to his forehead and his cheeks as water dripped from them. His skin, normally faintly glowing a healthy golden color, was now frightening white, as if he had been standing in the storm for hours on end, or perhaps as if he had seen a ghost. It appeared clammy as well, glowing slightly grey under the light of the living room, a liquid that certainly looked like sweat (rather than rain) sticking to his face. His lips were parted slightly, taking in deep breaths, his chest shuddering with each one. Staring into the distance, his eyes seemed not to focus on anything in particular. His body weight seemed to rely completely on the door, his legs bent slightly and quivering. His hands lay at his side, but they shook violently under the sweater paws of his cardigan, a black piece soaked completely through.

“Minseok,” Sehun gasped, baffled by his hyung’s appearance. The elder appeared to not have heard the maknae’s words, simply standing there as if it was taking all of his energy to even catch his breath.

“Minseok,” Sehun repeated as he stepped closer, slowly, instinctively feeling as if he were approaching an injured animal. Almost ironically, it was then that Sehun noticed the cut on Minseok’s lip, his bottom lip inflamed and irritated and definitely bleeding. His pale face held other small scratches on it as well, faint under the light but definitely present. Sehun could just barely make out a few spots on each side of Minseok’s neck, angry red markings clinging to his skin.

They chillingly reminded Sehun of fingerprints.

He suddenly felt as if he was the one that could not breathe, as if he needed to gasp for air himself. Struggling to ignore this feeling, Sehun blinked languidly, urging time to stop making it seem as if he were treading through mud. He needed to get to his hyung. There was something wrong, and he needed to help.

“Minseok,” Sehun repeated a last time, his legs somehow bringing him within feet of his hyung, whose eyes finally dragged themselves toward Sehun’s face. Still, it did not seem as if the cat-like eyes truly registered his dongsaeng, only following through with instincts that his body had long since learnt to respond to. 

“Sehun,” his hyung managed to say, but his voice barely sounded like itself. It broke at the end, and was raspy, as if he had been screaming or crying. His eyes still seemed to be looking through Sehun.

“Hyung, what happened?” Sehun questioned, taking a final step closer so that he was only a foot away from Minseok, bending down slightly so he could better look Minseok in the face. His hyung seemed to instinctively flinch at the moment, just slightly before he caught himself, but Sehun still noticed. 

“What… happened?” Minseok repeated, finally connecting with Sehun’s in a way that denoted he seemed to be getting a better grip on where he was and what was happening. 

“You’re hurt, hyung,” Sehun said, hand moving upward to touch the cuts on his face -- definitely more noticeable that he was up close, looking angry and red, a splotch on his cheek reminding Sehun of slight carpet burn even. He stopped his hand before it got too close, thinking better of it when he recalled the earlier flinch. “Do you want me to get Junmyeon?” 

“Junmyeon?” Minseok said, blinking slowly. “Yeah. No.” Sehun regretted asking Minseok in the first place -- he didn’t seem in touch enough to back safe and sane decisions for himself. 

“Let’s go sit down, okay hyung,” Sehun said, trying to keep his voice calm and steady, even though he could feel fear creeping its way up his throat, threatening to cause his words to tremble and shake. He had to remain stable for Minseok.

Minseok didn’t say anything, but he didn’t flinch when Sehun slowly wrapped an arm around his forearm, keeping his touch gentle and suggesting instead of demanding. He took slow steps toward the couch, the TV still buzzing with a low light and the sound of characters yelling at one another. Minseok followed wordlessly.

Upon arriving at the couch, Sehun turned toward Minseok, moving his hands to the elder’s shoulders. “Take a seat, hyung,” he directed, a strange feeling telling him that Minseok needed direction right now, needed instructions and not suggestions. Still, he kept his voice kind, as if Minseok could still refuse. He didn’t though, allowing Sehun to guide him down to a sitting position on the couch.

He descended stiffly, flinching when his butt hit the seat. The movement caused Sehun’s stomach to drop, an invading thought trying to tell Sehun about what might be wrong. He tried his best to ignore it for the moment, until he got Minseok settled and comfortable -- he couldn’t let his anxiety take over. 

“It’s okay hyung, I’m here,” Sehun said, for lack of what else he could do. He wasn’t used to taking care of people, and was unsure of what his next step should be. He was only brought to action upon seeing Minseok shiver, reminding him of the soaked nature of his friend. 

He didn’t want to leave Minseok alone, but he had to get him new clothes. Sehun settled on doing it as quickly as he could. “I’ll be right back hyung,” Sehun told Minseok; the latter simply nodded slightly, staring at his hands, watching them tremble. Sehun noticed bleeding under some of Minseok’s fingers, and took a shaky breath to keep himself balanced. 

Recalling a time when he was sick and Junmyeon had taken care of him, Sehun also quickly grabbed the thickest and fuzziest blanket they owned, throwing it in their dryer on the highest heat possible. Walking quickly to Minseok’s room, he rustled through the elder’s drawers, picking out fluffy pajama pants and an oversized hoodie that he recognized as Chanyeol’s, somehow having made its way into the eldest’s wardrobe. His movements didn’t wake Jongdae, the elder snoring loudly and deep into his REM process. 

He didn’t want to wake Jongdae, who would probably react too emotionally to Minseok’s appearance. But he did recognize that he couldn’t deal with this on his own -- he was barely handling simply looking at his hyung. 

Junmyeon was the obvious option -- the leader, always seeming to have an answer. He wouldn’t mind being woken up, especially not for Minseok, one of his closest friends.

Sehun grabbed a pair of soft boxers and knitted socks before rushing over to his own room, seeing Junmyeon sleeping peacefully in his bed. He had a bit of guilt for waking their leader up, especially with practice so early this morning, yet the image of Minseok’s broken face returned to his mind, and he quickly rushed to Junmyeon’s side.

“Hyung,” he said urgently, shaking the older’s shoulder with the hand that wasn’t holding the bundle of clothes. “Wake up, hyung,” he repeated, louder this time.

“Sehun?” Junmyeon mumbled, his eyes groggily blinking open. “What’s wrong,” he whispered, sitting up slightly and rubbing his eyes with his fists. He must’ve noticed the worried look on Sehun’s face, otherwise he might’ve jokingly whined about being woken up.

“Junmyeon-hyung, something’s wrong with Minseok-hyung. He only just got back, and he’s really out of it. He’s hurt, and -- and I think something really bad happened,” Sehun rushed back, wanting to get back to Minseok as soon as possible. It seemed improbable, but what if Minseok left in the couple of minutes Sehun had been gone? What if he had done something else to hurt himself?

Sehun’s words seemed to have the same effect of throwing a bucket of water over Junmyeon, because he jumped out of bed, eyebrows furrowing. “Fuck. Where is he now? Did he say anything to you?” 

“Barely anything, hyung. It’s like he’s in a trance. He’s completely soaked from the rain, so I got a change of clothes for him… I put a blanket in the dryer, too, it should be warm by now. I left him sitting in the family room… I didn’t want to leave him alone, but I had to get him some clothes and get help from someone else,” Sehun rambled, his worry for his hyung inhibiting his ability to speak with a clear head.

“Let’s go,” was all Junmyeon managed. Sehun imagined he was having difficulty fully grasping the extent of the situation, but knew his hyung would understand as soon as he saw Minseok.

As they walked back the the family room, Junmyeon remained silent, the short walk full of tension. Upon re-entering the room, Sehun was relieved to see Minseok still on the couch. It seemed like he had not moved at all, still simply looking at his hands.

Junmyeon almost ran to Minseok, crouching down so he was face-level with his hyung. His eyes quickly scanned the elder -- Sehun noticed them widening as Junmyeon took in the cuts, the drenched clothing, the blank look on Minseok’s face. His eyes trailed back up after glancing at his shaking and bleeding hands, catching themselves on Minseok’s neck -- noticing the same marks that Sehun had seen earlier.

“Minseok,” Junmyeon said, gently, and it reminded Sehun of how he had talked to Minseok just minutes ago. Sehun stood awkwardly, holding the bundle of clothes, unsure of what to do. He felt considerably more confident in Junmyeon’s abilities to lead the situation. 

Minseok looked up at Junmyeon, eyes still blinking languidly. “Jun-Junmyeon?” he stuttered, head tilting slightly in a question. He shivered again, weighed down by the heavy rain-soaked clothes; although Sehun did suspect he’d still be shaking even if he wasn’t wearing drenched clothing.

“Minseok, we’re going to get you out of those wet clothes, okay?” Junmyeon instructed, taking the same route as Sehun had and using a soft yet authoritative voice. Minseok seemed slightly apprehensive at the suggestion though.

“You -- you want me to take my clothes off?” he said, voice trembling slightly and cracking at the end. He seemed to look at Junmyeon in an uncertain manner, skin still frighteningly pale. 

“Just so you can change, okay? Look, Sehun already has some nice and warm clothes for you to change into,” Junmyeon explained, although his eyebrows furrowed at how Minseok reacted to the simple act of taking off his clothes. They were used to changing in front of one another. 

Minseok’s eyes slowly moved toward Sehun, seemingly surprised that he was still there. His eyes landed on the pile in Sehun’s arms, and he nodded sort of reluctantly. “Okay,” he said. “Okay,” he repeated, as if he were trying to convince himself. He went to stand, but immediately fell back down with the effort, flinching once again when his backside landed harshly on the couch. Junmyeon’s eyes followed the movement, corners of his lips turning down. 

Sehun suspected whatever adrenaline had helped Minseok manage to make his way home had long since left him, and in combination with the injuries he had, Minseok had no energy to even stand up. Junmyeon must have concluded something similar, as he moved closer to Minseok with tender eyes. 

“Let me help you,” the words a command but still giving Minseok a choice. The eldest paused for only a few seconds before he nodded, looking away from Junmyeon. The leader grasped Minseok’s hands, and slowly pulled him upward, arms straining with the effort as Minseok barely put in his own energy to help. Even though Minseok winced through some unknown pain, they eventually had him standing.

Junmyeon’s hands hovered at the bottom of Minseok’s hoodie, “Do you want me to help you get your clothes off?” Minseok nodded slowly, seeming to have handed over all control to Junmyeon. It appeared to Sehun that he was using all his energy simply remaining conscience to the conversation. 

Junmyeon slowly lifted the wet fabric, careful of where it stuck to Minseok’s skin and halting whenever Minseok winced. It was a slow process, but eventually the material was pulled over his head. Minseok was left shirtless, his skin only slightly damp from the rain. 

Sehun seemed to noticed something at the same time Junmyeon did -- the marks on Minseok’s torso. They gasped at almost the same time, because these weren’t light scratches like the ones on Minseok’s face. These were a lot more worrying. 

There were more finger-shaped marks, that would soon turn into disgustingly dark bruises -- similar to the ones on Minseok’s neck. These lingered on Minseok’s shoulder, on his hips. There was more light carpet burn on his stomach. Even more horrible were the bites. On his collarbone, on his hip, on his shoulder -- there were bite marks. Obvious from the outlines of teeth, they looked painful, the one on his shoulder even looking like it had bled at the time of impact. After one more glance, Sehun blanched at another bite mark he noticed, this one around Minseok’s left nipple. His eyes closed against the burning of tears, and his hands gripped threateningly right around the clothes in his hands.

Junmyeon gulped loudly, pausing as if unsure how to react. His hand reached out as if to touch the injuries, but he must have thought better of it. Sehun was scared of how Minseok’s back would look.

It was then that his eyes traveled to Minseok’s arm, mostly noticing similar finger marks -- but pausing at the elder’s wrists that had been covered by his hoodie. His wrists looked red and irritated, lines streaking around them as if they had been held together by something. 

Sehun felt bile push its way up his throat, and he could barely keep it down.

Junmyeon finally spoke, “Minseok, we’re gonna talk about these injures after you get dressed,” not leaving room for argument. Minseok’s mouth opened as if to protest, but no words came out. 

Junmyeon quickly glanced around Minseok’s body as if to check out his back, and with the appearance of a grimace on his face, Sehun haltingly glanced as well. 

His back wasn’t as visibly injured as his front, but the lingering print of harsh fingernails stretched across the whole expanse. A few of the strokes had cracked open skin, and Sehun withdrew his head, not wanting to see anymore.

Instead, he put the pile of clothes on the table nearby, picking out the oversized hoodie. “I’m gonna put this on you, Minseok,” Sehun explained, a quiver finally entering his voice. The elder blinked up at him, nodding. Sehun accordingly went to pull the hoodie over Minseok’s head, but a hand stopped him.

“Wait,” Junmyeon whispered, pulling Sehun a few steps away from Minseok and turning away from the eldest. Sehun turned toward Junmyeon as he said, “What if some of the wounds are infected? We need to treat them,” he explained. Sehun paused, and found himself agreeing in his head, although a part of him raised another thought.

“I agree hyung,” Sehun started, keeping his voice low in the hope that Minseok couldn’t hear him that well, “But don’t you think he’ll need to go to the hospital or something? We should just get him comfortable for now, see if he tells us what happened, and then take him somewhere a professional can see him.”

Junmyeon paused, considering the words, and slowly nodding. “He probably won’t want to go, but you’re right.” Junmyeon let Sehun return to Minseok, who seemed to be unaware of the conversation that just occurred. The maknae slowly pulled the hoodie over the eldest’s head, apologizing whenever Minseok whined at the pain. It seemed to be getting to him more now, small sounds of pain escaping his lips. Sehun felt terrible.

“Your pants and shoes next,” Junmyeon expected. His voice trembled slightly, and Sehun suspected why. Sehun knew that he himself had a pretty clear idea of what happened to Minseok, especially after seeing the bite marks. He tried not to dwell on it for the moment, but the thought that Minseok had been assaulted continued to persist. He couldn’t think about it without feeling as if the world was collapsing, and he guessed that Junmyeon had figured out the same thing, with the say he seemed to hesitate to take off Minseok’s pants. 

“Do you want to do it yourself -- do you want some privacy?” Junmyeon offered, allowing Minseok some control over the most sensitive part of his body. The elder seemed to consider it, but shook his head slightly.

“Quickly,” was all he managed to say. Junmyeon nodded, his hands hesitating toward the buckle of Minseok’s jeans. He closed his eyes, took a deep breath, and unbuttoned them, dragging the zipper down quickly. His hands gently tugged at the fabric, apologizing whenever Minseok winced -- reminiscent of Sehun only a minute ago. The pants seemed to stick more to Minseok’s skin, but eventually they were pulled down, Junmyeon carefully removing Minseok’s shoes as well. Sehun, simply observing, noticed a sock was missing, and that there were no boxers. Sehun doubted that Minseok had did without wearing them in the first place, and his stomach flipped at the thought of where they might be.

Quickly grabbing the boxers from his pile of clothes, Sehun stood still for a moment before holding them out to Minseok. “Do you want to step into these, hyung?” The elder glanced at the undergarments, and flinched slightly. 

“No boxers,” he muttered, and Sehun placed them back on the table quickly. Turning back around with the soft flannel pajama pants, Minseok grasped at them, holding within his shaking hands. Sehun and Junmyeon glanced away to allow Minseok the privacy of pulling them up without being stared at. Still, Sehun had caught glimpses of things he couldn’t avoid -- more finger marks on his thighs, and what appeared to be the edges of bite marks where Minseok’s inner thighs started. Sehun was glad he didn’t have to see more, afraid of the damage -- afraid of the bleeding he might see if he had to look at Minseok’s backside.

Sehun turned around as Minseok was finishing up with the pants to grab the fuzzy socks. “I’ll help him with these,” Junmyeon interrupted his actions, “you can go get the blanket.”

The blanket. Sehun had almost forgotten about that. “And a large plastic bag, please,” Junmyeon added before Sehun could walk away. Confused, Sehun glanced back at his hyung, before Junmyeon added, “to put his old clothes in. Just in case,” and Sehun understood -- just in case the rain hadn’t washed everything away, just in case they needed evidence. 

Nodding quickly, Sehun rushed to the drying machine and pulled out the thick blanket. The heat was almost too much, but Sehun had the urge to wrap it around himself for a moment. His breath felt shaky, and he didn’t know how much longer he could deal with this. 

A quicky image of Minseok’s small body, shivering even in the new clothes as Sehun had left the room, reminded Sehun that his hyung needed the warmth and comfort of the blanket far more than himself. Resolutely nodding, Sehun grabbed a plastic bag from the kitchen, dropping it on the table as he re-entered the living room.

Minseok had the socks on and was back to sitting on the couch. Junmyeon was knelt in front of him, simply holding his hands and rubbing them gently with his thumb. He appeared to be mumbling something, but to both Sehun and Minseok is sounded like comforting gibberish. 

Upon seeing Sehun, Junmyeon smiled. “Minseok, we have a blanket for you. It’s nice and warm, okay?” Junmyeon smiled, eyes scanning the elder’s trembling body. Minseok nodded, but his eyes had started to stare off into the distance again, as if he were losing himself. 

Sehun took a step closer, laying the warm blanket all over Minseok’s body. It encompassed almost every part of him except for his head, and Sehun saw the elder’s hands move under the blanket in order to grasp it closer to him. His legs seemed to curl up too, as he snuggled as far as he could into the corner of the couch.

Junmyeon and Sehun lingered for a moment, aware of the impending conversation, unsure if Minseok would even be willing to talk. 

“Minseok,” Junmyeon began. Sehun reached out, instinctively, and brought his hand close to Minseok’s face. When the elder simply stared back at him, Sehun continued, running his hand lightly through his hyung’s hair, now mostly dry and a fluffy mess on his head. He repeated the motion, and Minseok seemed to like it, closing his eyes and tilting his head into the warmth of Sehun’s hand.

“Mmm,” Minseok responded. 

“Minseok-hyung,” Junmyeon tried again. Taking a deep breath, he finished his sentence. “You know we need to talk about what happened.”

Sehun felt Minseok go completely still under his hand.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope it was okay...  
> If you want to read more, please leave a comment and kudos! They really encourage me so so much.  
> Thanks ♡


	2. Gravity

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Minseok just wanted to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry!!! I should stop posting works before I've finished them, because I'm horrible at updating. I've learned my lesson, and in the future I'm only posting finished works (or works that I haven't only written one chapter to, goodness). I am so sorry for the long wait, thank you for all the kind comments, they motivated me to update. This chapter would not be here if it weren't for your support! And I swear, no matter how long it takes me to update, I WILL finish this. Thanks for not giving up on this story, I hope you all enjoyed the update.

“Minseok,” and the elder could vaguely register a voice saying his name, but he was still stuck on what Junmyeon had last said. _He wanted Minseok to tell him what happened._

That -- that wasn’t possible. How could he ever tell Junmyeon, let alone innocent Sehun, about what had _happened?_ He couldn’t even manage to think about it, the memories making his throat burn with bile. He anxiously swallowed, the bitter taste remaining on his tongue.

”I -- I can’t,” Minseok managed to mutter, because Junmyeon kept staring at him. He could still feel Sehun’s fingers carding through his hair, but they paused at his words. Only for a moment though, until the soothing movement resumed. Minseok wished he could stay here, with Sehun’s hands lulling him to sleep, into a slumber that he would never have to wake up from.

With the hands moving so delicately through his hair, he could almost imagine that any other type of touch didn’t exist. No harsh touches, no hard grips fueled by cruelty and -- and lust.

”Junmyeon, I want to sleep,” Minseok heard himself speak, the words slow and muddy as if they were dragging themselves through swampy waters. He turned his head slightly, Junmyeon’s face within his sight, concerned eyes and furrowed eyebrows meeting him. “I just want to sleep,” Minseok whispered, and for some reason his eyes started to burn. He didn’t know why. He didn’t know why. He didn’t know why, but he could feel himself blinking rapidly, his throat growing tight. “I just want to sleep,” he whispered, feeling a tear slip down his cheek. He wanted to rapidly wipe it away -- he had cried enough, he had cried enough -- but his hand felt heavy in his lap, impossible to lift. His whole body felt weighed down. 

Junmyeon, sweet Junmyeon, did it for him though, wiping away the tear with a gentleness that made Minseok’s heart ache. “It’s okay, hyung. It’s okay, you don’t have to talk about it now. Later, okay? It’s okay hyung -- It’ll be okay.” Minseok could feel his eyes burning less at the leader’s words, his head nodding slowly. 

”I want to sleep,” he repeated. It felt like a task now, even speaking. He just wanted to sleep. He just wanted to crawl under his covers, wrapping them around him so he could feel warm and -- safe. Maybe. Or as safe as he could feel. He wanted to wrap himself up, and fall asleep, and not dream -- or, at least not have any nightmares. He wanted to sleep and perhaps never wake up, never have to face the next day, never have to wake up and be confronted with the ache of his body and the pain in his memories, and never have to explain to his members and managers and company how _weak_ and _stupid_ he was. It felt like there was a gaping hole in his chest that would never heal, stealing away his breath and his will to move, to live. He just wanted to sleep, forever, and never wake up. 

Sehun was still carding his fingers through Minseok’s hair, so the older couldn’t see him, but he heard him speak. “Hyung, we… we really want you to be able to sleep, too. But… But, um, well,” the youngest paused, and Minseok simply waited for the younger to finish his words. He was too tired to respond at all, even though it seemed like the “but”s meant that Sehun and Junmyeon didn’t want Minseok to sleep. All he could do was sit there and listen; the small, rational part of his brain knew that he was in no state to make decisions for himself. The rest of his brain was just urging him to sleep.

He felt cold, even with this fuzzy blanket and his dongsaengs’s warm presences. He was really cold…

”What Sehun is trying to say,” Junmyeon took over, his voice more confident compared to Sehun’s unsure tone, “Is that we’re really worried. Hyung, you have a lot of injuries and we’re not really sure how serious they are… I think you need to have them looked at, right away.” The words seemed to waver at the end, and Minseok thought that Junmyeon must know how much the older would hate that suggestion. He immediately shook his head, not stopping even as he felt Sehun’s long fingers pull away from him.

”I -- please, please no hospital. Please, I really don’t want to go, I don’t want to go,” Minseok insisted, the only thing he could focus on was saying no. He didn’t want to be ignored again, he didn’t want to say _no_ only for it to be ignored, like his words didn’t matter, like he didn’t matter.

He wanted people to listen when he said _no._ He thought that Junmyeon would listen… He wanted Junmyeon to listen…

”Okay, okay, no hospital. But what about a clinic, or a private doctor?” Junmyeon seemed to be hoping for some type of compromise, his voice almost as desperate as Minseok’s. “The manager hyungs could get you an appointment--” Minseok’s face balked at this -- “or I could schedule it myself, we don’t have to tell them just yet, you know how SM has some confidential doctors. And we could go in the morning, then, since they won’t be open till then, and you could rest a bit. Does that sound okay, Minseok? We really need to get you checked out, please…” Junmyeon’s voice trailed off, his hand hesitantly resting itself on Minseok’s forearm. Minseok felt warm for one of the first times that night, in the spot where Junmyeon’s palm rested. He quickly slid his hand into Junmyeon’s, holding the younger’s palm tightly, scared he would let go. He didn’t, only squeezing Minseok’s hand back reassuringly. 

”A private doctor,” Minseok repeated, taking a deep breath. “No manager hyungs,” he said, ignoring Junmyeon’s soft reply of “not yet.” He didn’t want to think about that. He could only focus on -- “Sleep. I get to sleep.” He felt exhausted, as if his bones had shattered and no longer could hold his body up. 

”Yes,” Junmyeon affirmed, his tone sounding relieved. “I’ll schedule it as soon as I can in the morning, we’ll go before any of the other members wake up, okay? Don’t worry about practice or anything.” Minseok could already feel his eyes drooping with relief, ready to pass out now that he wasn’t plagued with fear of being forced to go to the hospital. “Just don’t -- don’t shower, okay?” Junmyeon asked, slightly timidly. In the back of his mind, Minseok knew why, but he shoved those thoughts away. He didn’t want to think about them. He didn’t need to think about them, not now.

”I can sleep in your bed tonight, hyung, if you want to sleep in the same room as Junmyeon,” Sehun offered, the voice above him almost startling Minseok. He had nearly forgotten that the maknae was there.

”Yes… that sounds nice…” Minseok affirmed. He didn’t want to disturb Jongdae, he didn’t want Jongdae knowing what had happened. Junmyeon was comforting, he could lead Minseok and make decisions for him without Minseok worrying about whether they would stray from his best interests. Junmyeon was his best friend. He could trust Junmyeon. He could sleep in the same room as Junmyeon. “Thank you, Sehun-ah.” 

”Okay, let’s get you to bed," Junmyeon said, standing up slowly while keeping his hand in Minseok’s. He tugged on it gently, a silent gesture asking Minseok to stand up with him. The oldest paused, and Sehun seemed to notice.

”Do you need help getting up, hyung?” The voice sounded eager to help, and Minseok felt his heart warm. He might not have wanted any member to see him like this, but in the end he was glad that Sehun had been waiting for him, that Sehun had taken care of him. It was all so tender and gentle, Junmyeon and Sehun, their actions starting to warm up his insides just a bit.

And -- and he could finally sleep.

”I -- yeah,” Minseok uttered, belatedly answering Sehun’s question. The younger appeared next to Junmyeon, ready to help. The leader grabbed both of Minseok’s hands, pulling with all his strength as Minseok tried to put in his own effort. It hurt, his legs straining under the aches of his body, his ass reminding him painfully of the events earlier in the night. He quickly focused on the feel of Sehun’s large hand on his upper arm, helping to steady his body, trying to ignore all other feelings other than his long fingers. It took a moment for his body to balance itself, but he was finally up, clutching the warm blanket around him like a shield.

”Let’s go, hyung,” and Junmyeon and Sehun’s warm hands guided him down the hall.

He let his eyes close. They would guide him to the right place.

***

Minseok didn’t think he slept, not really. His eyes were closed, and he could feel himself in some sort of heavy state, but he could also feel every long minute pass by. The darkness slowly getting brighter behind his eyelids, the footsteps of someone going to the bathroom early in the morning before returning to their room. His eyes hurt, and his head was pounding, but he couldn’t sleep.

Every time he closed his eyes, he saw.

Junmyeon “woke” him not long after the sun had risen, earlier than the other members had to be up for dance practice. His dongsaeng had offered to help him dress, but Minseok just wanted to stay in the pajamas they had put him in last night. The younger reluctantly agreed, not even making Minseok brush his teeth before taking his hand and leading him quietly out of the dorm.

Through the private garage, into Junmyeon’s car. The soft leather hurt. Resting his head against the cold window, eyes closed just a moment. Junmyeon humming, and ah, maybe he could sleep like this. Junmyeon’s humming was pleasant, safe. It would never belong in the space of yesterday, in the same space where violence and cruelty existed.

Before he knew it, a soft hand landed on his arm, and Minseok startled awake. It seems like he really had drifted off to the younger’s humming, but they had arrived in front of a discrete building, the surroundings not looking familiar to Minseok.

”This doctor is the same one who helped Baekhyun a year ago, remember? She was really confidential, and her private practice is a little bit outside of the city so no one will see us. She even has a back entrance see? Remember how much Baek liked her?"

Not really, but Minseok nodded. If Baekhyun liked her, then she must be okay. Baekhyun was good. Junmyeon, Sehun, Baekhyun. They existed separate from the rest of this world, a little space carved out where a few good things could fit themselves. The space was filled with Junmyeon’s humming, the scent of the detergent Sehun liked to use, the soft touch of their hands in his.

Junmyeon exited the driver’s side and Minseok knew to wait for him, by now he was letting the younger lead him through everything. His car door was soon opened, and the older gently pulled his hyung out, wincing alongside Minseok when the older felt small pains ache through his body.

Minseok didn’t want to think about the doctor’s visit. The memory was part of the bad space, not because the doctor wasn’t nice but because she wanted him to _explain,_ and he wasn’t going to talk to a stranger. Junmyeon must have explained everything from his point of view, because then she was talking about all these tests she had to do, but she just needed his permission, and it was really important that he do this, and even Junmyeon was agreeing.

He didn’t want to, he really didn’t want to, but Junmyeon knew what was right. And Junmyeon was grasping his hand and nodding his head, so Minseok squeezed his hand back and nodded his head along with his best friend.

How long it took, Minseok didn’t know. It felt like hours. He hated it. The doctor had asked Junmyeon to leave, but Minseok didn’t think he could go through with this if the other wasn’t here. She let him stay. Whenever Junmyeon couldn’t hold his hand, Minseok felt a little weird, like his body was here but his head was floating elsewhere, like he was sleeping and dreaming about his own life.

The word police was mentioned once, and Minseok felt like a bobblehead with how vigorously he shook his head _no._ Junmyeon let him say no, and once again, Minseok felt his good space swell with the presence of Junmyeon.

On the ride back home, Minseok asked Junmyeon multiple times what the doctor has said. He didn’t mean to annoy his dongsaeng, and he didn’t think Junmyeon was annoyed, just worried, but he couldn’t seem to remember much of Junmyeon’s response each time. Finally, after a few times, he understood that he was mostly fine. The bites were bad but not infected, the lamp cord burns would heal with ointment, the bruises would fade. The cuts on his lip and on his skin were superficial and would not scar. One of the bite marks had needed stitches. That might scar. He didn’t have a concussion, but needed rest. And…

There was some tearing _there_ but it would heal. Everything would heal.

There were some tests that doctor wanted to run, something about diseases, something Minseok was definitely not going to think about. He would be fine.

Everything was going to heal.

”Everything is going to heal,” he repeated out loud, as if to speak the thought into existence.

Junmyeon didn’t say anything, just kept humming to the song on the radio.

Junmyeon’s humming, Sehun’s hand in his hair, warm clothes with the scent of the maknae’s detergent, and Minseok with no bruises, bites, or burns. Yes, the good place was safe, and he would stay there, where everything was healed and this car ride never ended, there was no origin or destination, just the journey with no cause at the start or effect at the end. The space between, yes, that was the good space. The space between before and after, between action and consequence. The space where nothing happened except humming and holding hands.

He fell asleep to the lull of the road, too exhausted to have any sort of dream or nightmare.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry, I feel like the quality of this chapter isn't exactly where I would like it to be, but. I knew I needed to post it now or it might never happen... I hope you understand...  
> Perhaps I'll do alternating chapters between Sehun's POV and Minseok's. Maybe, I'll have to decide.  
> Writing this I honestly wanted to make this into a Junmyeon/Minseok story LOL. Oops. There will be more Sehun soon, I promise!
> 
> Please leave a kudos and a comment if you enjoyed ♡


End file.
